Week 25, Day 4. Accountability.

I don't feel like writing my blog. But I'm doing it because it's the only way I can hold myself accountable.

Today, I got up at 7 something, made myself eggs and oatmeal, but only had time to eat the eggs before work. I also had coffee with sugar, no creamer.

On my lunch I was super hungry. I ate at Waffle Shop. Again. 2 eggs over easy, two pieces of wheat toast and home fries with ketchup. Plus coffee with sugar and cream.

At 2pm, I had a Mountain Dew.

At 6pm, I went to Wegman's and ate Vegetarian Chili with their cornbread and FOUR MOZZARELLA STICKS.

For the last mozzarella stick, I kept saying to myself, "Let that be the one thing you say no to." That quickly dissolved. Each bite was a bargain with myself. I ate the entire thing.

It was at that point that I realized I was self-medicating with food. I had a pretty full day, kind of stressful...not in a bad way, but I was constantly on my toes. By the end of the day, I wanted to disconnect. And I was hungry.

So I disconnected from the world by eating. Next time I will be more aware of that.

Then I went to my friend's house and had two glasses of red wine. I don't know why, really. She would have been 110% supportive of me drinking water, but for some reason I chose wine.

Again, next time, I will put my goals in the front of my mind...even say them out loud...and I'll make a different choice.

Now I want a good nights sleep because I have another full day tomorrow.

Week 25, Day 5. Back in the saddle.

Too tired to write much. Suffice out to say, today I ate better than I have in weeks, but two meals were NOT clean.

I also went to the gym and it rocked. My social life has finally slowed down, and I will be back to telling a lot of people "no" to events that involve food. I've found that the opportunity to eat "just this once" bad food can be a daily occurence.

And I need sleep.
I also need to keep blogging. NOT having to say that I ate Waffle Shop AND Wendy's yesterday has been wonderful in helping me think it's ok to keep eating that way.

Looking forward to kicking tomorrow's ass.